Big Goals, Small Moves: Why We Get Stuck

Ambition can be both a spark and a stumbling block. Most of us carry at least one big goal quietly in the background—a dream that lights us up but, if we’re honest, also feels just out of reach. Maybe you’ve pictured yourself launching a side project, getting serious about your health, growing your network, learning a new language, or simply becoming the kind of partner or parent you admire. These aren’t passing whims; they shape who we hope to become. Yet, far more often than we’d care to admit, the very size of these ambitions leaves us standing still.

If you’ve felt this—frozen at the starting line—you’re in good company. When a goal feels enormous, it’s so easy to get stuck waiting for the “perfect” moment or to obsess over mapping every step before you dare begin. But here’s the truth no one advertises: that planning can turn into paralysis. The space between where you are and where you want to be can look so wide that even taking the tiniest first step feels impossible.

This is where behavioral science throws us a lifeline—the idea of activation energy. In my own experience, the harder something feels to start, the less likely I am to touch it at all. But if I set out my workout clothes the night before or open a blank doc for a new project, suddenly starting doesn’t seem so daunting. The barrier drops, and sometimes just crossing that line is enough to set things in motion.

You’ve probably heard the classic line: “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” Wise words, sure—but in real life, that first step can weigh a ton. We’re conditioned to believe that big change only comes from dramatic action.

The Psychology Behind Small Steps

So why do small moves work when bold leaps so often fizzle out? It has everything to do with how our brains handle challenge and reward. When we face down something massive, our minds treat it as a threat—too big, too uncertain, too much to process. Motivation drains away and anxiety or avoidance steps in.

Here’s the relief: small steps sneak past our mental defenses. Doing something that feels manageable gives us a jolt of accomplishment right away. Every tiny win triggers a hit of dopamine—not just making us feel good but also fueling our desire to keep going. Instead of being swallowed by the big picture, we start linking progress to positive emotion.

This isn’t just feel-good theory—it’s backed by research. Teresa Amabile and Steven Kramer’s Progress Principle shows that even modest achievements lift our mood and motivation. Noticing and celebrating these micro-successes starts a feedback loop that keeps us in motion.

This shift matters for momentum that lasts. Breaking big goals into bite-sized pieces gives us more opportunities for success—and each win, however minor, builds confidence. Even if your first steps seem trivial, they count more than you might think. Over time, those tiny victories pile up until the end goal no longer looks so far away.

There’s a growing body of evidence behind this approach. Forbes describes a microaction as a small, discrete task with a clear beginning and end—something you can actually do right now without much friction. Microactions are powerful because they’re easy to start and offer quick feedback; they keep motivation alive.

But here’s the deeper part: real change sticks when we connect it to what truly matters to us. According to Self-Determination Theory (SDT), outside pushes—like deadlines or rewards—can get us moving for a while, but they rarely last (Deci & Ryan 1985). When our motivation becomes internal—when our actions line up with what feels meaningful—we’re far more likely to keep going (Ryan & Deci 2017).

By pausing to reflect on why we want something and tying our small moves back to those deeper values, we make motivation personal—and make it last long enough for new habits to form and big goals to be reached.

“Numerous studies in varied behavioral domains indicate that more autonomous and self-concordant motivation is associated with greater behavioral persistence… When people more fully internalize the value of a behavior or domain, they are more likely to maintain relevant behaviors than when they engage for more controlled reasons. One result is a higher probability of actually achieving the goals people pursue” (Ryan & Deci, 2017).

From Overwhelm to Action: My Shift in Mindset

One framework that really helped was “Today, Not Someday”. Each morning I’d ask myself: what’s one thing—just one—that will nudge me forward today? Some days it was fifteen minutes on a side project; others it was reaching out to someone new or just taking a walk instead of skipping exercise altogether. The steps were small but real—they chipped away at inertia and let confidence build naturally.

And here’s what surprised me: those incremental actions didn’t just accumulate; they started to feed off each other. Momentum grew. The goal that once felt enormous slowly became less intimidating because I was already in motion—not waiting for some mythical green light but living right inside the process.

I’ve seen this echoed in others who create meaningful change. Their journeys rarely start with grand gestures—they start with showing up and doing what they can today.

The Power of Breaking Goals Down

Focusing only on the big win can blind us to how much progress small victories make over time. Think about compounding interest in finance: those little deposits grow bigger the longer you stick with them (Forbes Business Council). Progress works the same way.

Take writers as an example—many bestselling authors commit to modest daily word counts, sometimes as low as 200 words a day. At first glance it sounds underwhelming, but stacked up over weeks and months? Those words become chapters; chapters become books.

‘Your Move’: Practical Strategies for Progress

That’s why I’m introducing ‘Your Move’—a series built around helping you make real progress on your goals without overhauling your entire life or getting lost in overwhelm. Every post will bring you practical strategies you can use right now—tools for getting unstuck and building momentum step by step.

Here are ten powerful tips you can try today:

1. Identify Your Minimum Viable Step: Ask yourself: What’s the smallest possible action you could take toward your goal right now? Maybe it’s drafting one email or writing a single paragraph.
2. Set Micro-Deadlines: Forget about planning months ahead; pick something you can finish today or this week.
3. Stack New Habits onto Existing Routines: Attach something new to something you already do—stretch while your coffee brews or listen to language lessons during your commute.
4. Track Tiny Wins: Keep visible proof of progress—cross off boxes, jot actions down in a notebook, or log them in an app (How to build momentum on low-flow days).
5. Visualize Progress Over Perfection: Aim for getting a little better each day instead of nailing it perfectly every time.
6. Limit Your Focus: Stick with one priority at a time so you don’t spread yourself too thin or dilute your effort.
7. Celebrate Consistency: Give yourself credit for showing up—even if some days are lighter than others.
8. Enlist Accountability: Share your intentions with someone who’ll check in and cheer you on.
9. Allow for Imperfection: Let yourself make mistakes and adapt as you go—it’s how learning happens.
10. Reflect Regularly: Each week, pause and review what worked (and what didn’t) so you can adjust your next steps (Stuck on a problem? Try this 3-step reset for productivity).

When you put these ideas into play, consider using a habit-tracker app or just an old-fashioned checklist on paper. Research shows that visibly tracking your progress—even if it’s just crossing off days—increases your odds of sticking with new habits.

It’s tempting to skip this step because it seems too simple or not “serious” enough—but don’t fall for that trap! The magic is rarely in complexity; it’s in getting yourself moving when inertia wants you stuck.

“the secret to creating lasting change lies in starting with actions so small that they seem almost effortless” (The Simplicity Habit).

Real-life success stories prove this point again and again. Dr. B.J. Fogg, Stanford behavioral scientist and author of Tiny Habits, puts it plainly: this principle is behind everything from Kaizen-powered business turnarounds (continuous improvement) to marathon training plans built on gradual increases and entrepreneurs who build companies by making just one customer call each day until momentum takes over.

Momentum Matters: Building Success One Move at a Time

The biggest wins rarely come from sudden flashes of genius—they’re built slowly through persistent effort, one intentional move at a time (Are you moving forward or just moving? How to spot productivity theater). Whether you’re growing a business, picking up an instrument, or nurturing important relationships, consistency is king: showing up again and again even when progress seems invisible or slow.

Momentum is the engine behind every transformation story I know—including my own stumbles and restarts. Each action—no matter how minor—fuels the next one until you move from stuck…to starting…to real change. Over time, what felt impossible becomes routine; what felt overwhelming starts feeling like your new normal.

I think of momentum like pushing a flywheel—the first few turns take effort but every push makes spinning easier. In personal growth, those early moves often feel awkward or forced; as habits settle in and confidence grows, everything gets smoother.

If today your ambitions feel too heavy or your dreams too distant, let me offer this encouragement: every big goal starts with one small move. You don’t need heroics—you need your next step. The rest follows—one move at a time.

Every transformation begins with a choice: Will you move forward today? By embracing the power of small steps, you honor both your ambition and your humanity.

So here’s my invitation: Take one step—however modest—and watch what happens when momentum works its quiet magic.