Memorial Day: More Than a Long Weekend

Every year, as Memorial Day approaches in the United States, it’s almost automatic—schedules fill with family plans, travel bookings, and the anticipation of a much-needed long weekend. For many, it’s the unofficial start of summer, a chance to slow down, reconnect, and recharge. But if you’ve served—or you know someone who has—there’s a heaviness to the day that doesn’t quite fade, no matter how many times it comes around.

It’s tempting to treat this day like any other holiday, to drift through it without much thought. Yet even that ability—to relax, to gather, to not think too hard about what’s missing—exists only because of those we’re meant to remember. For engineering leaders—people responsible not just for building systems but for shaping cultures—this moment asks more of us. It calls for a deeper sense of perspective and gratitude.

Some organizations try to bridge this gap—a moment of silence, shared stories of employees’ loved ones who served, subtle reminders of respect woven into the fabric of the day. These gestures matter. They pull us back, if only for a moment, from autopilot.

Zooming Out: Context and Perspective for Leaders

Here’s what stands out after years in both uniform and tech: as leaders, especially in engineering, we’re conditioned to zero in on the immediate—the next sprint, an incident report, that urgent deliverable crowding your inbox. Memorial Day challenges us to widen the lens and consider the broader context that makes any of our work possible.

Think about it. When you’re knee-deep in troubleshooting code, sometimes you have to step back and look at the architecture—the full system. Sometimes you even need to zoom out further and see the infrastructure that supports it all: networks, communities, even the society enabling your work.

The value in this kind of zooming out (or in) lies in examining problems from different angles. It’s how you assess where you are, where you might go next, and what opportunities exist that you didn’t see up close, as described by Archos Advisors on leadership perspective.

The truth is, most of us live deeply in the present—driven by deadlines and objectives, rarely pausing to consider the collective effort and sacrifice that paved our way.

Your Move: A 3-Step Practice for Memorial Day Reflection

Here’s where reflection becomes practice. Over time, I’ve settled into a simple three-step approach—one that honors Memorial Day while sharpening my leadership. It’s not complicated or showy, but it’s real.

Step 1: Do One Small Thing

As leaders, these small acts become micro-moments of reflection—a pause before a big meeting, a quiet note of gratitude to a teammate, or simply stepping back to ask what really matters right now. Don’t skip this step; it’s subtle but has real impact.

For additional strategies on reinforcing mindful leadership practices during times of reflection like Memorial Day, review The Change Resilience Playbook for engineering leaders.

Step 2: Ask What It Means

Reflection deepens when you push past action into meaning. I ask myself: Why am I free to relax today? Who made that possible? What do I take for granted that someone else gave up?

If you feel some resistance here—you’re not alone. Sometimes it stings to look directly at what’s been given or lost. But this isn’t about guilt. It’s about acknowledging inheritance—the freedoms and opportunities handed down through others’ effort and sacrifice.

For engineering leaders, these questions reframe your role within the organization. Are you stewarding opportunities well? Are you mindful of those who set the groundwork for your team’s success? Sometimes I’ve felt uncomfortable sitting with these questions; that discomfort is part of what gives the answers weight.

Step 3: Recognize What Was Given

Finally, I carve out a quiet moment for gratitude—not performative or loud, just internal acknowledgment: I see it. I remember. And I don’t take it lightly.

Gratitude is powerful in leadership. Recognizing what’s been given—by predecessors, mentors, even teammates who’ve moved on—fosters humility and respect. This mindset can spread; when practiced sincerely, it shapes cultures where contribution matters more than credit.

As Harvard Business School notes on reflective leadership, “Reflective leadership requires the continuous practice of reflection over time. This allows you to regularly examine and re-evaluate your decisions and responsibilities to practice, broaden, and deepen your skills, and to apply this knowledge when analyzing present situations.”

Research backs this up: leaders who integrate gratitude practices—like journaling or regular team appreciations—see higher morale and improved resilience during challenges.

For further reading on strengthening team culture by balancing empathy with decisive action, explore When Empathy Isn’t Enough: Defining Moments for Leaders.

From Reflection to Action: Embedding Gratitude in Leadership

It’s easy to let reflection end when the holiday does—but Memorial Day is just one opportunity among many. Lessons in perspective and gratitude should shape daily leadership practice.

In my own experience, modeling gratitude openly—but authentically—within your team changes things over time. Recognition shouldn’t be reserved for annual reviews or big milestones; make it routine and honest. Go beyond generic thanks or formal awards—be specific about what you appreciate and why it matters.

You can institutionalize remembrance in subtle ways too: share stories of past achievements during onboarding; highlight foundational work during retrospectives; encourage new team members to learn your organization’s history.

When engineers experience this kind of culture—a place where contributions are noticed—they feel belonging and purpose. That fuels motivation and engagement long after Memorial Day has passed. Insights from CodeInterview on building a strong engineering culture show how such environments help every contribution become part of an ongoing story—a living legacy that stretches beyond any one person or project.

For additional insight on developing resilient teams through gratitude and perspective, read Embracing uncertainty fuels team innovation for an exploration of how vulnerability and flexibility can drive breakthrough results.

Remember: most of what we enjoy each day was built by people we’ll never meet. Recognizing this within your team fosters an environment where everyone feels empowered—and connected—to something larger than themselves.

Looking Up: Why Leaders Must Remember the Bigger Picture

Engineering leadership is naturally future-focused—solving tomorrow’s problems today. But Memorial Day is a sharp reminder not to lose sight of the bigger picture.

Leaders who connect their team’s present actions to historical context unlock deeper motivation and a stronger sense of shared purpose.

Looking up from daily tasks isn’t just about historical awareness—it’s about understanding how context shapes opportunity. Honoring those who came before isn’t ritual; it’s inspiration for more mindful leadership—in yourself and others.

As you move through Memorial Day—and into whatever comes next—challenge yourself (and your team) to look up more often. Notice the bigger systems at play: technical architectures, organizational histories, even societal freedoms you may rarely name but always rely on.

I’ve wrestled with this balance too—urgency pulls hard against perspective. But when you pause long enough to reflect on where you stand—and who helped get you there—you lead with more wisdom and humility.

Let this Memorial Day serve as a gentle reminder: leadership is at its best when grounded in perspective and gratitude. Take time to honor the legacy enabling your journey—and invite those around you to do the same.